Carmen's Arrival

Pregnancy number two was definitely not as easy, as comfortable, or as well-documented. I had nausea with Gwen, but it was mostly in the evenings. During the days, I only needed to sleep through lunch to make it through. Carmen, however, had me feeling lousy from 9:00AM until bed.  The only time I felt well was for about 30 minutes to an hour after waking up.  With Gwen, I did better at eating healthy. When I was pregnant with Gwen, I wrote almost daily to her in a journal that I began at 11 weeks; Carmen's journal has 3-4 entries.

But one thing I did not do well with Gwen was writing down the story of the night she was born before some of the details were forgotten. It was 10 weeks later that I tried to write it in her journal. It has been 4 weeks since Carmen's arrival so hopefully I remember more this time.

There was one common factor with both of my pregnancies - the doctors thought that the baby was on the large side. Based on the sonogram on March 13 (37 weeks), Carmen was suspected to be over 6 pounds already, which was heavier than Gwen was when she was born. Dr. Feuille stated that this delivery will be like unchartered territory since she will be so much larger than my first - not sure if I will be able to handle a vaginal delivery.

On March 21st, I was dilated to 2 cm, 60%. Contractions were more intense and low. On Sunday, March 23rd, when I went to the bathroom first thing in the morning, I discovered that I was bleeding quite a bit. Just to be safe, I called the nurse to describe what I found that morning as well as other symptoms that had been going on for a few days prior. She suggested we go to the hospital. Drat.

So we went in and hooked me up to the machines - all was well. Water had not broken, blood was normal due to the checkup the Thursday before.

I left work early on Monday, March 24th, when I began timing contractions that were 15 minutes apart then rapidly down to 5 minutes apart. With my history of things progressing quickly, I didn't want to still be at work when I felt the urge to push! But in driving home, the contractions went back to 15 minutes apart and by evening, more sporatic than that.

At my checkup on March 26, Dr. Feuille scheduled me to be induced at 5:00AM on Wednesday, April 2nd. I was still at 2 cm and 70% efaced. Feuille was concerned about Carmen's size enough that he didn't want to wait. I was depressed! I wanted another fun birth story that began with contractions and the uncertainty of do-we-or-don't-we-go-to-the-hospital. Induction was so boring and predictable (which most would assume I would prefer given my tendency to want to plan every last detail).

I ate jalapenos. I looked for the 'spicy' symbol next to menu items when we went out to eat. I asked for the HOT salsa. I walked... a lot. I did squats and lunges. I hoped that the painful maneuver that Feuille performed at my last appointment did the trick. He claimed that labor typically starts a couple days after.

But Saturday came and went. Then Sunday. And Monday. I decided since we did have the luxury of knowing it would be Wednesday, I would begin maternity leave that Tuesday to have one last day to myself to tie up loose ends and sleep (didn't happen by the way).  My mom came Tuesday evening so that she could be home with Gwen in the morning. We had to be at the hospital by 5:00AM so we didn't want to have to wake Gwen that early.

What a blessing it was that mom was already at the house! After supper, winding down and getting Gwen ready for bed was pretty typical. As long as I was still, the contractions were fairly intense and regular. But it had happened enough times that my hopes stayed low.

One thing was different though. When I took Gwen to bed, the contractions continued. They remained intense enough that standing was uncomfortable and I had to cut down our normal routine of "sweet dreams, I love you's, I miss you's" so that I could sit back down because mommy's tummy was hurting.

Mom and I stayed on the couch as I timed the contractions on my app.  A strong contraction was soon followed by a more mild one so it was hard to say with certainty how far apart they were.  By 10:00PM, they were 5 minutes apart when counting the more manageable ones. I was beginning to have to breathe through the harder ones and was getting sweaty.  By 10:40PM, I was closer to 3 minutes apart consistently.

Andy remembered how with Gwen, my contractions started right a bedtime. He missed out on an entire night's sleep! He didn't want that to happen again so he went to bed at 10:45PM. But I pulled him out of bed by 11:00 when it was obvious that these contractions were not going away.  We packed and headed out around 11:15PM.

I was about 4 minutes apart in the car ride over, unable to talk through the pain, breathing through. But when we got to the hospital, I was a bit concerned. I filled out the paperwork at the front desk for about 10 minutes and didn't have any intense contractions that whole time. Andy gave me 'the look' of "you better really be in labor - I could be asleep right now".  By the time we got in the room, it was obvious that the contractions were back.

My first check from the doctor was at 12:30AM. We made it! No April Fools birthday for my little girl :)  I was 4-5 cm and 100%.  At 1:15AM, still at 5.  3:00AM, was at 6.  I believe I had the epidural by then because they turned out the lights for us to rest a bit now that the pain was managed.  Just as I dozed off, I felt a gush. My water broke at 3:10AM!  No sleep for us...

Soon after my water broke, the contraction intensity escalated again with a vengence. I kept pressing the button to increase the drugs, but no relief! The nurse finally had to add a larger dose directly into my IV. Things were progressing too quickly for the epidural meds to keep up!  At 4:00AM, I was fully dilated. Then things got scary.

The monitor for Carmen's heart rate went quiet.

The nurse moved the monitor on my belly to try to find her, but had no luck. I watched her face and I could see her panic. She ran over to the wall and threw Andy's cell phone charger out of the way to get to the oxygen. The young doctor came in and I heard him say that this baby needed to come out right now - no waiting for the doctor on call. My legs were in the stirrups; the oxygen mask was on; I was being told to push. In my panic, I gave it all I could.

And after 5-6 pushes, baby Carmen was out! She was perfect, beautiful, and small!  We had to wait until after the hour of skin-to-skin to find out, but she weighed 6 pounds and 13 ounces.  18 1/2 inches long. She was not the huge baby that was suspected.

I cried when I heard her cry, when they told me she was perfectly fine. What an incredible relief! I don't think I have ever been so scared in my life.

Welcome, baby Carmen.

Gwen meeting her sister!  "She's so cute!"

A wonderful year, 2013!

What a year! It hurts my heart to realize how fast it all goes. My baby's a big girl, and in only three more months, we meet Carmen!

It's been a fun year. Work at Koch continues to challenge and fulfill. I was blessed in February with the opportunity to leave the country for the first time - my first stamp in the passport, Monterrey, Mexico. A one-day trip in the corporate jet. There's no better way to travel, let me tell ya!  Norwex has taken a back-burner, though I still use the products and I'm especially thankful for them now that I'm pregnant and trying to stay as chemical-free as possible.

Gwen started a new daycare in February and seems to be loving it a lot more than the previous place. Hugs all around are a must most days before we can leave - so adorable. I love that she has so many friends there.  She started a music/singing class in March so we got to see lots of 'performances' in our living room - she loves to perform. Took her to her first movie theater experience in April - only one bathroom break. Mastered the potty training challenge, celebrated a third birthday, went to the circus in June, first haircut and trip to the dentist in July (she's excited to get to go back!). She started a ballet/theater class in September - I have never witnessed anything else more adorable than that.

Andy is enjoying a new role at his job - commercial sales for Overhead Door. God has blessed him with a strong start. The company vehicle allowed him to get a Mustang, which he is very happy about. He took his annual vacation with the guys in August, always a lot of fun, I'm told.

So now, we're gearing up for an exciting and challenging 2014. Preparing nursery, arranging for preschool to begin for G. Blessings to you and yours for the new year!

January - homemade tiaras

February - new bed

March - playing in the dirt

May - birthday party

June - playing in new art playroom

July - trip to Kansas City

September - first ballet class

 

 

The good, bad & the icky

I came to a realization a few days ago. Once the New Year is here, which is coming rather quickly, I will be down to only three more months of pregnancy. I expressed my disappointment to a guy friend of mine at work whose wife is also expecting. He shook his head and asked, "why? Why are you sad about that?" I responded, "because I LOVE being pregnant!" He went on to explain, from seeing his wife in this same condition, that he doesn't see the upside.

Sure. I understand there's lots of not-so-hot that comes along with carrying a child. That first trimester is quite a doozy of a thing, was more so for me with this second pregnancy. It was tough to stay positive when I felt like I was stuck in the worst hangover for two months straight. And that super-human sense of smell...  Really not fun when combined with nausea and having to pee every 20 minutes. I held my breath a LOT those first few months. Another joy that doesn't mix well with tummy issues: gallons of extra saliva.

Then there's the dry patches of skin, the growing belly that I can't show off bare because it's covered in fur that sticks straight out. The pulled stomach muscles that feel like something's tearing inside when I simply stand up from the couch (finally). Road rage, night sweats, dizzy spells, sweaty pits and stinky feet. Heartburn, difficulty breathing, temperature fluctuations, gums that are swollen, tender, and quick to  bleed. There's water retention and swelling, skin tags, and puke burps.

On the icky side, there's discharge and nipples that have grown to the size of my face. The unkempt nether-region - shaving blind is not easy! And I hate the idea of getting the suction cup mirror to put in the shower. That just creeps me out. Some things just should go unseen.  Along the same lines, the toenails are in much need of a pedi - long and the polish is down to a jagged patch right in the middle of each nail.

There's a pain that comes along my right side when I walk more than 30 feet. The house is a wreck. The laundry gets out of control in a hurry. I'm running out of clothing options. I am not gifted in the pill-swallowing area so those horse pills they call prenatals are a daily challenge. I have a constant fear of falling, fever, under-cooked meat, microwaves, and putting on socks. I force myself to drink water all day long, thus contributing to the frequent bathroom trips, including midnight stumbles to the bathroom.

My breasts rest on my stomach - a feeling I am not accustomed to. I now have to lift and separate the girls when washing and drying.  My stomach itches. Everything is stretching. When I was on the potty one afternoon, Andy came into the bathroom and stared. "That's a lot of skin," he dared to say. Yes, some angles are better than others.

I used to cuddle up to hubby when getting ready to fall asleep. Now there's a big tum-tum in the way. So we assume our positions on opposite sides of the king-size bed, me on my LEFT side as all the books suggest. And I struggle to stay there. I bought one of those pregnancy pillows this time around - the ones that are so huge it's like a whole other body sharing the bed. And let me tell you, it's a joy with all of the stretching ligaments and lack of coordination to get up and over that monster every bathroom run or early morning. But most mornings I do wake up on the bright side, laughing at my extremely odd dreams.

I also admit, there are the moments of unreasonable fluctuations in mood. Back in that first trimester, my mother tried to help out by going to Goodwill to get me some maternity clothes. All has been in fast forward this second go-round so I needed maternity clothes much sooner. But she bought Large items. I held them up, one at a time, and tried to hold back the tears. They were hideous, but also did I mention Large? I could hold it back no longer. HUGE break-down.

Pregnancy brain, I firmly believe, IS a real thing. My husband thinks it's one of those off-the-wall made-up things that pregnant women have invented to get away with being stupid. I admit, I do dumb things sometimes, pregnant or no, but I do it much more when pregnant. Case in point: so I'm pouring my cereal one morning. I walk over to the fridge and proceed to try to fit the cereal box in the refrigerator. I realize what I'm doing, giggle, and take out the milk. I return to my bowl and pour the milk on the cereal as I continue to giggle about how 'pregnancy brain' stupid that just was. Then I walk into the pantry and set the milk jug on the shelf. I step away and look at it - something's off here. So, um, yes Andy. It's a real thing.

So as I sit, focused on the aches and pains, wallowing in one of my for-no-reason bad moods, trying to figure out what I can/should eat... Carmen kicks. And this is exactly why I LOVE being pregnant. The world melts away. I forgive everything else and just try to be in that moment. I put my hand on my belly and watch it jump. I giggle as it feels like she's strumming on my urethra like she's playing the bass.  It's just the two of us. All that matters is that God has blessed me with this experience - this life inside of me that I get to carry with me for nine whole months is a special gift. I'm a mother. What I have prayed for so many times is this, this moment. What joy, what overwhelming joy.

Nursery Plans

Progress in the baby room is slow-moving! But progress has finally started. It's funny, I had all but given up on the idea that we would be blessed with another child. That room had remained a catch-all for over a year after our move... just in case. Well, I finally decided to spend a weekend and convert it into a fully functional art studio.

Two weeks later, if that, I had a positive pregnancy test. Ha!

So... the process has now begun to convert it from art studio to baby room. And I do have some plans so I hope it all comes together!

 



• The glider is one we purchased at Babies R Us for Gwen.
• The crib will be here in three days - babyletto Modo 3 in 1 Crib with Toddler Rail, Two Tone - purchased from Amazon.
• The dresser is one we have already, from Target I believe.
• The photo divider is black at the moment but I have intentions to paint it before April.
• The lamp is from Target.
• Bedding is Dwell Studio, blossom. I did manage to catch a crib sheet and plain pink bedskirt and stroller blanket on sale.
• The garland is also Dwell Studio, but sold out. I may have to get crafty with supplies from Hobby Lobby...
• I used letschipit.com from Sherwin-Williams to create the pallet next to the bedding
• SW 7006 Extra White
• SW 6057 Malted Milk
• SW 7522 Meadowlark
• SW 6381 Ajou Pear
• SW 6874 Ardent Coral
• The other pallet is from Behr.com, to pull in the best complimentary blue
• 190B-6 Wet Coral
• 520D-7 Mosaic Tile
• 200A-3 Blushing Apricot
• W-B-120 Victorian Pearl
• Our baby's name is Carmen - I call my daughter Gwen gigi so Carmen will have the nickname cici. I will do this same thing in Gwen's room, but I thought I might buy some letters and paint them the same as the wall color to place by the art. Inspired by Pinterest
• Not shown that will also be in the room is the changing table, a simple walnut finished, open frame that was used for Gwen, purchased at Babies R Us.
• I also plan to make the mobile myself using the hardware tutorial found via Pinterest - still searching for subject matter inspiration, ideas welcome!

Will update as it actually begins coming together. I hope to buy paint this week and begin that first critical step - most everything else is on hold until it's painted and ceiling fan is installed. Then I would like to work on creating a closet organization system because we are limiting ourselves to one dresser and the changing table.

'Tis the Season

No joke, our baby girl is due on April 1, 2014 - April Fools Day! As I type, she hiccups inside my belly. Once past the sick stage, I must say that being pregnant is absolutely wonderful. Knowing that she is growing and wiggling in there, that I get to bring her with me everywhere I go, what is better? I love to sit back and just feel her move and kick. It's so exciting to plan for April, but I must admit, it's a bit scary as well.

Gwen is 3 so it's been a long time since we had a tiny new baby in the house. Will it all come back to me? Or will I be the nervous wreck I was with her all over again? Will I be able to nurse this time? Oh, I so very hope so! Will labor go as smoothly and quickly as it did with Gwen? Yes, please!

Big sister is quite excited. She talks about how her heart starts going fast and I ask her why, she says it's because she's so excited to be a big sister. She talks about what she will teach her, the seating arrangements at the table and in the car. Her prayers at night most frequently begin with, "Thank you for the baby growing in my mommy's tummy." We are so very blessed.

For the time being, though, we're soaking in all the Gwen-as-the-only-child time we have left. We're prepping for Christmas, singing carols and baking, arts and crafts, and anticipating seeing her eyes light up on Christmas morning. Oh what fun.

This is Gigi's 4th Christmas:

Goofball

I recall when Gwen was a baby, I thought she was so serious. Always observing and taking it all in, seeming so focused and somber. Well, things have changed a bit. We have a full-blown comedian on our hands these days. She loves to make people laugh and it is one of my favorite things about her.  Some evidence to my claim...

Muse

For a few years now, Gwen has been my muse for photography, but lately she's making me miss drawing and painting. There are so many photos that I love of her and I finally need to turn them into art - the kind I haven't done for darn near a decade by now. I want to sit and sketch a picture, with one of the photos I took today as the inspiration. I guess I'm writing this before actually doing it to hold myself accountable. There's been a lot of things I've intended to do over the years. Didn't do quite a few of them. So this will be different. I'm going to sit down with my pad of paper and bundle of H and B pencils (not sure I remember which are my favorite anymore). I'm hoping it will all come back to me. As much as I used to love doing art, it would truly be a shame if I let the gift slip away.

With G as my muse, I will do art again. I plan to post the work sometime soon. In the meantime, I must narrow down the photo to re-create...